Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Saturday, December 14, 2024

The Secret to a Wonderful Christmas

Every Christmas I say to myself, "This year I'm not going to get stressed out. This year I'm going to remember the True Meaning of Christmas..."

But as the season gets closer, my mind and heart get clouded by the "have-tos" and I find myself bogged down by guilt and panic.

As a child growing up, my parents made Christmas pretty magical. And I have always had a high standard for making the season magical for my children too.


But as an adult, what I have had to discover on my own is that I cannot make Christmas perfect.


 
And there is no need for it to be!


There is a line in a Christmas song by one of my favorite musicians, Linford Detweiler, that says, "Am I ready to receive the Gift the Christ Child has for me?"


 

And that line hits me every year. I try to keep it in my mind, actually. 


 

Because the true meaning of Christmas is not all the stuff, and we know that! So why is it so hard to put it into practice?


I want to give my family a beautiful Christmas. I want to celebrate in the most magical way possible. 

I want to give my loved ones gifts that bring them joy, that make them feel loved.


I want to get the most out of every day this season.

We have an idea, don't we? That we must give our loved ones The Perfect Gift in order to show them how much we love them- that somehow, if we don't do that, it's a sign that we don't love them enough.

This is a lie! Of course, we want to give our loved ones things they enjoy, things that show how we love them and know about them.  We want to express our love through the perfect gift. But life isn't perfect- love isn't perfect. We make a mess of things and we forgive each other and we love each other anyway.


And sometimes, things work out pretty good!


What I'm saying is, CHRISTMAS DOESN'T HAVE TO BE PERFECT! It just has to be full of love.


You know how in the movies, there's always a moment where either the tree falls over, or a special ornament shatters and it is supposed to be a bad omen? That's not real!

I used to always laugh at those parts in the movies because when our kids were younger, we pretty much had the tree fall over at least once a year. We came to think of it as our tradition. It was no bad omen! It meant life is life and here we are, and this is what happens.


So celebrate the season by bringing hope to the hopeless. Burn the cookies, sing the carols off key, and give gifts to your loved ones. Oops, I forgot to fill the advent calendar- let the kids be part of the magic!!

When we let go of trying to make things perfect, we are able to receive the Christ Child's gift for us:

HIS PEACE. Which is the whole point of Christmas!


 Christmas doesn't have to be perfect...

It just has to be...

FULL OF LOVE!


Happy learning!

~Beth







Saturday, September 29, 2018

A Lovely Drive & Hike up the River

We went for a lovely drive the other day, up through Poudre Canyon.
Summer had almost officially ended, and we thought we could catch a bit of Fall color in the higher altitude. It was a bright blue day, unusual, since we had so many fires this season. We didn't see any aspens turning, but there was color in the brush; bright red poison ivy and assorted tree shrubs.

We hadn't taken the kids on a drive in a while, because they had been *crazy* in the car lately, but we had just gotten a new (to us) van, and the kids loved it, so they were eager to go for a drive.
It was so beautiful up there~ the camera did not capture the color~ the hills were bright yellow.

Rowan was *so happy* to find this very nice rock, and they were both so happy to be there~ I could tell it was healing their bodies and minds to be there...
The boys started hopping rocks, upriver, trying to make it to a big rock they saw up ahead. They never did make it to that rock because it was too hard to get across, but they sure had a lot of fun.

On the way down the mountain, we crossed over and took Rist Canyon the rest of the way home. After a quick stop at Wendy's we came home & had lunch. That was an unusually special and happy day we had together.

~Beth






Monday, February 15, 2016

GLOW NIGHT

 I got to have another Mama & Fynn time the other night! It's been a while. I took him to the GLOW Night of Worship at church. That means a lot of black lights & dressing up in florescent & white.  There were plenty of stations for kids to make glow- jewelry- crafts, and Fynn and I used florescent ribbons to decorate Mama Whale.  Then glow sticks were passed out and the lights went down and the fun began...

While other kids danced and sang to the music, Fynn and I sat on the ground while he used his glow-stick to contemplate different angles.

 We had a nice time talking together in the car on the way there & back (A BIG DEAL) and we talked about putting on a "Glow Night" for Rowan, since it had been a few months since we busted out our own black light. So, over the next few days, we made paintings and drawings with florescent paint & markers and put on our own "Glow Night". We had a lot of fun. ~b











Monday, December 21, 2015

Lessons From Dickens' Christmas Carol

 Since Fynn was very little he has been very much into Mickey's Christmas Carol and Muppets Christmas Carol during the holiday season.

 He used to dress up like Scrooge in his "best dressing gown", hat and cane, saying, "are you Hooge?" (Which meant "Look at me, I'm Scrooge!") He also loved to dress up like Gonzo as "Charles Dickens", in a scarf, sport coat and flat cap.

 For a craft, Fynn and I made a doorknocker with Goofy's face (as Jacob Marley) which became a Christmas Treasure we put on the door every year. We've also made chains of white paper (Jacob Marley's Chains), and framed in our hallway at Christmas time are the sayings, "Talk is Cheap" and "Time is Money", which can be quite puzzling if you don't know the meaning behind them. (They hang on the wall of Scrooge's Counting House in Mickey's Christmas Carol.)

 He used to also sing the "Marley and Marley" song (Muppets ) over and over again while on the swing.

 Those two movies have inspired so many conversations for us as a family. There is the theme of Scrooge "changing his ways", which is something we talk about a lot. There is also the Christmas Spirit of Giving, and "being a good friend", the Mystery element: who really are the Ghosts of Christmas? and the Fear element. Fear is a big topic in Fynn's life. He always becomes obsessed with things that scare him until he can conquer it ~ then it becomes his favorite thing.

 This year, Rowan and I made door knockers of both Jacob and Robert Marley (Muppets), and Fynn helped me turn a sheet into The Ghost Of Christmas Yet To Come (Muppets) and Scrooge's Tombstone. Very spooky. Fynn has been very much into "spooky" this year, and it's hard to explain, but it's in a very good way. Let me put it this way: If the Ghost Of Christmas Yet To Come is in your room, who can hurt you?

 As an adult, I have to recommend reading the original story. There are parts in the book that get left out in the movies, that are wonderful, beautiful, and hilarious! But I do highly recommend also the two movies mentioned; they are beautifully done, and have influenced our lives. As someone who appreciates hand-drawn animation, Mickey's is the most beautiful on my list.


Goofy as Jacob Marley Doorknocker

Ghost Of Christmas Yet To Come

Muppets Jacob Marley                                                 Happy Learning! ~Beth          

Thursday, December 3, 2015

A Very Texas Thanksgiving

 A Very Texas Thanksgiving, 
or
"It's better than the alternative!"



Well we headed on down to Texas for Thanksgiving this year, to spend time with Rico's side of the family. It's always a tough choice to make when the two halves of your family live a thousand miles apart, but alas, even though we went to Texas earlier this year it's been a while since we've spent a holiday there. The kids really wanted to go, and it's important that they spend as much time with their far away family as they can. Nobody's getting any younger after all.

One of Fynn's favorite things to do at G.G. and Paw Paw's house, where we always stay, is run up and down the hill that is their yard. I can't tell you how many miles we ran, just going up and down this hill, dodging fire ant hills, trying to stop as close to the lake as possible without falling in. Here is Fynn in his cheetah suit blazing by. 



Fynn made a friend in Blade, the neighborhood stray cat that everyone feeds. Jumpy animals have always scared him, and this cat was a pushy one, so it was a big step for him to befriend this little feline. 


It's been a year of big changes for Fynn. One thing most folks know about people with autism is that they are reluctant to change. Fynn recognizes things he wants to change about himself and works really hard at them. Three years ago he liked dogs a little bit, then he got bit in the face by Lucky, and has spent the last three years terrified of dogs. He would scream and try to climb me like a cat climbing a tree anytime a dog got anywhere near (or not so near) him. In the photo below he is sitting next to Lucky petting him, feeling safe and secure with him. Lucky, th' dog that started it all. It took him three years to work this one out, but he did, and we are so proud of him for it.


He even made friends with Bailey and Badge next door. As he was getting over his fear of dogs he started with the big calm ones, the little dogs usually move fast and bark and jump, and that was harder for him. Well, these little guys were no exception, but Fynn made friends with them anyway. 



Rowan was a charmer as usual, and had everyone talking like Cars characters by the end of the trip. Him being Lightning McQueen, and everyone else talking like Mater mostly. He also spent a good deal of time sitting in Paw Paw's lap, just like i did when i was a child. 



Here's a collection of Maters and McQueens he made out of legos. 


 We spent a lot of time outside. Took a lot of walks. Threw things into the lake. Made "Texas" scarves out of Spanish Moss. Wandered around the neighborhoods and woods. Marveled at the apple trees that were blossoming and loosing their leaves at the same time.






 Our motto on this trip was "It's better than the alternative." Meal times were really hard for Fynn. No matter where we ate, he went crazy during meal times. So when he'd get up and run through the house, using the hallway as a racetrack, and someone mentioned him not sitting and eating with us, or his needing discipline, we laughed and said, "It's better than the alternative." The alternative being him being loud, yelling in peoples faces, kicking any chair he could reach, bouncing in his, sliding it back as far as he could (he did that too, in his walker chair, as a baby), knocking our drinks over. Running in th' hallways aint so bad after all. You can't spank a disability. So yes, we let him run.



On Thanksgiving morning we took the kids to a beach, found a truffula tree and a water moccasin skin. Played in the sand. Fynn made hills to drive imaginary cars up and down, and measured their angles. Rowan copied him. There is nothing more pleasant to an understimulated kid than sand. 









 When we got back to the house, more of the family was there. Uncle Joe and Aunt Isa had never met Rowan, and hadn't seen Fynn since he was a baby. They got along well, and everyone dealt spectacularly with Fynn's need for constant motion and his lack of social graces. And miraculously, he sat down and ate Thanksgiving dinner with us, the only meal on the whole trip that he actually sat down and ate without being disruptive. As soon as he was done he quietly got up and left. When someone remarked about his leaving the table early at least three of us laughed in unison: "It's better than the alternative!" It was a wonderful Thanksgiving. 

At last it came time for us to go. We were supposed to go to a Horse Boy camp, but th' rain and other factors drove us to head for home early instead. Fynn has been really into hills and Google Earth lately. He uses Google Earth like other kids use Minecraft. He makes models on there, maps out routes, labels hills and roads and makes speed limit signs and measure distances and all kinds of stuff we never knew you could do with that program. Anyway, before we'd left he mapped out a route for us to take which involved us going through Southern New Mexico over a particularly hilly section of I-25. He found the biggest hill on I-25, amidst miles and miles of hills, and wanted us to take this route. His route, however, was at least seven hours longer, so we told him we didn't have the time to go that way, but maybe some other time we could. Well, since we were missing the camp we had a couple of extra days to travel, so we asked him if he still wanted to take his route and drive over all those huge hills. Yes! he cried. And after a day of driving through an ice storm, we made it to New Mexico, and with Fynn in a near bliss state drove over all those hills he found on Google Earth. We'd never been in that part of the country, and it is Beautiful. Sometimes it's a good idea to let an eight year old plan your road trip. Thanks Fynn.



In the bathroom of one of the hotels the kids found a red heat lamp, and couldn't get enough of it.


Finally, after a day of driving through beautiful, sunny New Mexico, we ended up back in the Colorado snow, and home sweet home. Happy Holidays ya'll.